Incapacitation

Welcome to the home of the original Incapacitation Conference, a symposium on the elevated mindsets of postmodernism. The conference was held in Mountain View, California, April 17-21, 2015.

Programme chairs Casey B. and Aimee G. led various sessions and were joined by special guest lecturer Mikey G. for a panel discussing Italian American influences on the second modernity theory. Musical accompaniment, a top consideration among attendees, was unanimously hailed as world-renowned, topped by Cupid's headliner performance at 11:31 AM on April 20th, 2015.

Like most academic philosophical symposia, proceedings concluded with no meaningful findings but featured unique discourse and uncovered numerous areas for further study, such as questioning the necessity for such specificity in the compositional subject matter of Bowling for Soup's catalog.

Attendee feedback was largely positive and included several standout testimonials:

  • I'm beside myself!
  • That was a very good lunch.
  • My ass is dry now, but it wasn't before.
  • The air is thicker.
  • Sometimes I can only see parts of the room at a time.

Agenda

  • Friday, April 17, 2015: Conclude preparations; attendee check-in
  • Saturday, April 18, 2015: Pre-conference workshops
  • Sunday, April 19, 2015: Pre-conference event: Alcatraz Island
  • Monday, April 20, 2015: Conference proceedings; reception dinner (barely)
  • Tuesday, April 21, 2015: Recapacitation; attendee check-out

Conference Materials

NOTE: Due to their commercially proprietary nature, many conference materials are considered confidential, with access requests considered on a case-by-case basis.

Programme chairs maintained separate conference minutes, documenting a collection of various metrics, ideations, attendee quotations, and other contemporaneous notes pertaining to conference ongoings.

Conference organizers used a variety of custom engineered planning tools to solicit attendees' interests and special needs.

A playlist of the conference's world-renowned musical accompaniment remains publicly available on YouTube Music.

A programme chair in an Alcatraz jail cell

That all too familiar feeling...

Pankake mix, batter, whisk, chocolate chips, and several bottles of whiskey next to a stovetop.

What were we doing here again?